Missing Mom

I’m a big boy now, all grown up…

Been through a lot.  Travelled some rocky roads.  Been injured, been sick, lost jobs, lost friends, seen trouble, been in fistfights.  Worked hard for a lotta years, raised kids, lived and died with their troubles too.  Still do.  But I am still standing.

Nevertheless… Sometimes I want my mommy.

It’s her birthday today.  She would’ve been… let’s see… um… old.

She’s been gone almost three years now.  A lot of people are missing her today.  She’s a very miss-joris-beugels-9Af1xSn7Jkw-unsplashable person.  I could go on and on about her but I will spare you, plus I don’t want to get all blubbery.

I have been at peace with her passing ever since, but especially those first few days and weeks.  Not that I ever had any doubts about my mom’s eternal future–she loved Jesus with her whole heart–but right after she died I was absolutely overwhelmed with assurance that, after a rough life, she was truly home.  I can’t explain it exactly, but I had a feeling of great joy at her homecoming, like some of the heavenly joy of that great celebration leaked over to me.

I tried to hold onto that feeling but it has mostly faded to head knowledge rather than heart.  I remember it though.  I remember that it was God who comforted me when I needed it the most, just like it was Him who helped me along my rocky roads.  He is the reason I am still standing, hope intact.  He is My Rock.  I will never be shaken.

Thanks for pointing me to Him, Mom.  Happy Birthday.  I love you.

A.J.

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